If you’re like me, you have a tendency to blow a gasket from time to time. I’ve always been the type to “blow up… then cool down really fast.” I have discovered, however, that my outbursts help nobody!
Here’s how to control your temper:
1- Think before you react. Our reactions are often based on feelings rather than facts. Someone says or does something, and we suddenly feel angry. We “assume” that they made us feel that way NO! You made yourself angry by telling yourself, “Who do they think they are?! I don’t have to take that. I’ll show them who’s in charge here!” It’s our self-talk that triggered our anger. The Bible has some good advise in the Book of James. It says, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger. “To break anger’s negative cycle, practice saying to yourself, “STOP!” Then don’t react until you ask the person to clarify their words or actions. Say something like, “I want to understand. Please explain what you meant by…” By listening to understand, you interrupt your anger build-up and gain some self control.
2- Don’t speak your mind when you’re angry. I love the old Irish poem that goes, “We’re constantly hearing O’Flannagan say, ‘I gave him a piece of my mind.’ And it isn’t surprising with so much gone, that so little remains behind!” The Bible says, “The tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do” (James 3:5). People will just tune you out or discount your accusations and probably get angry in response. Nothing gets resolved then.
Don’t let a hot temper drive a wedge between you and a loved one. Anger blinds you to reality. The problem that you are so angry about may be… YOU!!!
