Interesting day so far… and it’s only 2 pm here on the East Coast.
First thing, my activity on Facebook is going to be short-lived. I read a comment by a former student who bashed Jesus, slammed Christianity in general and mocked Focus on the Family for paying for commercial time on the NFL game yesterday. The sad thing is: this guy was an on-fire Believer in high school. I posted on Facebook that I was sorry that he had become so cynical… that he had been such a strong withess to me when he was in HS. and… what happened?! All of the atheists on his wall erupted! I should have known better. I warn students all the time: when you put it on the internet, it’s out there for EVERYBODY to see. No more Facebook for me!
Second… today would’ve been my Dad’s 91st birthday! He died waaaaay too young. Died of a heart attack the night of his 56th birthday, shortly after midnight— so I guess it was technically Jan. 16th. What a shock to get that phone call at 2 in the morning! As I look back on his life and our relationship, I can’t help but marvel at the work that God’s Holy Spirit has done in my life.
For years after his death, I was very bitter toward my dad. He was a “teaser” and could be highly critical of me. His idea of “encouraging words” were not what I’d call very positive in nature. For example, the night I signed my football scholarship my senior year in high school. The coach from William and Mary had just left the house and my dad turned to me and said, “Congratulations son… I never thought you’d do it.” KAPOW! Wow… “Thanks Dad!” He couldn’t have deflated me any more than if he’d dropped me with a sucker punch to the solar plexus!!!
By 1993, I knew that I had to deal with this bitterness. It was eating away at me. He wasn’t around to talk to obviously. He had to up and have a heart attack and die on me before I had the chance to work things out! A friend offered me a copy of a book which was instrumental in helping me to forgive my dad and restore our relationship— even though he was gone. The title of the book is Healing for Damaged Emotions by David Seamands. Since reading and applying what Seamands states we can do to heal memories, I truly feel set free.
I can look back now at my times with my dad and just smile! I have no bitterness… no anger. I have come to realize that he did the best he could to be the best dad he knew how to be. I can pruodly admit now that what he built into me is character— and a work ethic and a mental toughness which have all helped me achieve what I’ve achieved professionally. In my emotional life, the glory goes to my Heavenly Father, though. From the Bible studies that I’ve done; from reading Seamands’ book; from the many times of sharing and wise counsel from Spirit-filled friends; with the help of my wonderful wife… through the direct intervention of God’s Holy Spirit!… I can say that I have been transformed by the renewing of my mind in this area of having an unforgiving attitude toward my dad.
To think today that it is Dad’s birthday and get a warm feeling inside for him… it confirms for me that God is alive and working in my life. He wants to work in your life too!
